Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Thar She Blows!!!


I'm so bizarrely fried from my re-entry into the work world that I can't manage a post tonight, so perhaps more to come over the weekend. But, I will say this--I knew my pixie cut/Liza Minnelli/housecleaning Janet wasn't gonna stick around for too long. Sigh.

And with this episode's being the Janet and Ambreal show, you knew the two of 'em were SUNK.

Discuss amongst yourselves.

Until my energy returns, you are still in the running towards becoming America's Next Top Model!

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Hey. Make Me Over. Tell Me Do You Like What You See.

Haircuts all around today, as I too happen to have gotten a bit of a makeover in the form of a cute short pixie cut (not that I haven’t had this before, but I had been growing it out of late and decided to go back to the choppers, as I always do) as well as several new items for my wardrobe which now needs to include fancy new work clothes thanks to the fancy new job I just landed! So in the spirit of the beloved Top Model make over episode, as well as my own foray into a new look (i.e. no more Danskos to work!) I’m going to get right to business and deliberate immediately!

Ambreal: Not a dramatic change, but if she can work on more dynamic facial expressions, she could be the silent killer of the cycle.

Bianca: Someone should have shaved that girl’s head ages ago. Screw the wig—I was FLOORED by how stunning she looks with an eighth of an inch of hair. And as painfully trying as Bianca was last week, it seems this week she was humbled by her haircut and was quite the trooper where other girls would have griped endlessly about getting buzzed. Kudos to Bianca for rocking her look and attitude.

Chantal: I know she’s pretty, but bad baby’s breath pic aside, I still don’t see her with any amount of modeling moxie. The straight hair and bangs are nice, but she better get over herself and buck up. If she’s so obsessed with wanting to be a model, you’d think she’d have figured out that she just needed to kick it during the shoot and not whine and cry about too much direction. Suck. It. Up.

Ebony: This girl is killin’ me. Someone please put her out of her misery. I liked her better on the cruise when she was a beeyotch.

Heather: No make over needed. Stunning as is.

Janet: As a redheaded pixie cut girl myself, I was super bummed they changed my pixie cut girl Janet’s color, but she looks divine in the black. And once they compared her to the divine Liza Minnelli, I was sold. In my world, Liza's a religion unto herself. In fact, I am now so moved by the spirits of Liza and Janet, that I’m debating making the change to a soft black myself. And yes, the pic on my Blogger profile is me with dark hair, but it was burgundy and not black and it was brief and I went back to red shortly thereafter. This is, of course, probably what will happen again, shortly after I make my hair dark which will probably happen tomorrow. My hairdressers LOVE me.

Jenah: She’s pretty spectacular and she’s already booking jobs with Parisian photographers… As my friend E. always says, "le sigh."

Lisa: I’m willing to bet there’s absolutely nothing anyone could do to this girl to make her look bad. I might have liked to have seen her with an edgier hairstyle (Tyra was right in wanting to see it straightened), but whatev. She’s gorgeous no matter what.

Saleisha: Like we couldn’t see her spot in the bottom two coming. It was about time she got her comeuppance after so much gloating about the house last week. She looks quite lovely with her new cut (Very Veronica Webb, I think, but that might be because I’m so in love with Veronica right now, thanks to Tim Gunn’s Guide to Style. I want everyone in the world to be Veronica. Including me. Saleisha probably has a better shot.), but her picture really did su-uck.

Sarah: Every week I forget Sarah exists. Can’t ever remember anything about her and she never seems to stand out. I like her haircut though and she did take a good photo and win the challenge. But I’ve already forgotten her in the time it took me to type the last sentence.

Victoria: Like we didn’t see this one coming, part deux. The editors spent the whole episode making sure we were well aware that modeling was never Victoria’s dream; that she believes high fashion is ridiculous; and that she’d much prefer to wear sneakers, a t-shirt, and hit the library. Those of us who know our Top Model history, know exactly what all of that means: Striii-iiike!You’re outta there (in the spirit of major league baseball play offs)! Oh well. She was entertaining if not a bit prickly indeed. Although, she exited graciously by proclaiming she would rather go home than take some girl's dream. Although, now that I think about it, this just makes it sound like it was really her choice to go, rather than her admitting her own failure, which is not gracious at all, just smug and passive aggressive. No room in Top Modeling for that. Strike two (of course she's already out, so maybe that's just more of a foul ball)!

Until next week, you are still in the running towards becoming America’s Next Top Model!

And in Top Model alumni news, check this out! Hint: it's crazy Lisa from Cycle 5, of *peed in an adult diaper fame.* Oh, if only I could hear Bre's response to this little video item.
Thanks to K. for the tip!!

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Holy Crap! This is Real!

This photo has nothing to do with last night's episode, but speaks to two things: 1. How HOT Jaslene is and 2. How uninspired I was by anyone else last night.

Famous last words from the girl who got the boot, "Holy crap! This is real!" As Kimberly uttered her revelation, I realized I often think the same thing. Sometimes, I can't believe this show is real.

They say that boredom is nothing but a lack of intellectual curiosity. I believe that to be largely true, but on the other hand, sometimes boredom is just a lack of intellect and perhaps that is what caused my complete boredom during last night's Top Model. Stupidity abounds, and well, sometimes, I just can't believe it's real. And sometimes, I just can't take it. Is anyone with me?

It was only episode two and already, I was sick to death of Bianca and her faux uber competitiveness (sorry honey, even without the red hair, I still don't think you'd be high fashion), tired beyond tired of Saleisha's yammering on about her modeling experience (such a shocker that she won the challenge while Bianca ended up in the bottom two again--quelle surprise!), and totally disenchanted with yet another fake fashion show (like I'm so sure that designer put on a real show with only the Top Model contestants on the runway. As IF.).

All I have the energy to say, really, is too bad that Kimberly was sent packing instead of Bianca. I was finally starting to like Kim, although I was concerned about her lofty goal of being a role model for ordinary girls. I feel like she meant well, but...

As for deliberations, I'm not even going to go through model by model, that's how BORED I'm feeling. I agree with the judges that the highlights were Jenah and Heather with the likes of Lisa and Chantal close on their high, rock-climbing heels. I thought Ebony and Bianca were particularly awful while Janet, Victoria, and Sarah kinda hovered in the middle.

All I can say now is AMEN--next week is the makeover episode. Praise the lord and pass the weaves and highlights!

Until next week, you are still in the running towards becoming America's Next Top Model.